5 Quotes from ‘The Room’ to Help You Retain Customers

Posted on November 13, 2018

Tommy Wiseau’s self-written, self-directed, self-starring, cult classic “The Room” is often called the best worst movie ever made. It was described in 2003 by Variety as, “A movie that prompts most of its viewers to ask for their money back — before even 30 minutes have passed.”

In “The Room,” we follow a harrowing tale of love and betrayal as an inexplicable love triangle develops between Johnny, his future wife Lisa, and his best friend Mark. With the recent release and success “The Disaster Artist,” a film that tells the tale of the making of “The Room,” interest in the film has been rejuvenated. As audiences take a look back at “The Room,” let’s examine five quotes from the film, and learn how you can apply those to your business to improve your customer retention — because customer retention is all about love, and love is a prevalent theme of the movie.

1. “Anything for my princess!”

Johnny says this after bringing home a dozen red roses and a beautiful red dress to Lisa. Your business needs to be self-sacrificial, like Johnny, willing to do anything to provide the best customer service. Zappo’s built a brand that sold to Amazon off the backbone of great customer service. By providing for customers at every juncture, they’re more likely to return to you. Nothing makes people flee like bad customer service.

2. “Thank you, honey, this is a beautiful party! You invited all my friends. Good thinking!”

Just like Lisa invited all of Johnny’s friends over to the party, you need to incentivize customers to share your business on social with all of their friends. Incentives will help retain customers by giving them a reward along the way, and the increased sharing will lead to more customers that you can treat well. It also helps customers see your posts, which will remind them that they love your store. Bringing about brand awareness is never a bad thing.

3. “Ha ha ha! What a story, Mark!”

Johnny says this after hearing Mark tell a story. Your business should provide a way for customers to tell you their stories. Whether it’s success stories from your product or general feedback, a direct communication pipeline is crucial to maintaining and retaining customers. If customers feel like their problems are heard and understood, they’ll be more likely to come back during the good times too. This will aid you in removing pain points for customers too.

4. “Maybe I know more than you think I do.”

You know a lot of insights into your industry, just like Johnny knows more than Mark and Lisa think. Take those insights and communicate them regularly. Regular email communication is incredibly important to keep your customers active and engaged. Simple batch and blast emails are not the answer though. You need to curate your emails to your most valuable customers, and rather than pitching them products all the time, provide lifestyle content. Let them know what’s coming down the pipeline. There’s always time to sell products, but customers will feel valued if you’re offering simple, curated communication.

5. “You think about everything.”

Just like Johnny tries to say “you think about everything” to Lisa, your customers are imploring you to think one step ahead of everyone, and maybe offer that insight to customers. You need to separate your great customers from the rest to provide that unique insight, so create a VIP program. Reward customers for being loyal, and they’ll continue to be loyal. By providing a VIP program, customers will be incentivized to be more loyal because they’ll enjoy the exclusivity, but they’ll also tell their friends about the perks, incentivizing even more customers to be loyal.


In short, the methods of customer retention are largely common sense. Treat your customers well, and as more than customers, and they’ll stay loyal to your brand through thick and thin. Treat them poorly and they won’t. Take heed of Johnny’s advice: “If a lot of people love each other, the world would be a better place to live.” Love your customers, and make the world a better place to live.